By Paula LaRocque, KERA 90.1 Commentator
http://stream.publicbroadcasting.net/production/mp3/kera/local-kera-513601.mp3
Freaky Deaky: A commentary by Paula LaRocque
2006, North Texas Public Broadcasting, Inc.
Dallas, TX –
When a Fox News reporter referred to "the horseless rider" during Ronald Reagan's funeral procession a couple of years ago, I created a folder called "freaky deakies." It contains weird mistakes from the media.
For example: A newspaper want ad for an office manager specified that the applicant must be "prophetic" in Microsoft Office.
Maybe this ad in the pet section should have been in the automotive section: "Datsun free to good home."
One newspaper reporter wrote of the problem of "intimate domain," and another wrote that a new policy should "expediate" government efforts to help Katrina's victims.
A business columnist, in a wham-bam groaner, wrote glowingly of a professional who had reached the "pinochle" of success in his personal "Alger Hiss" story. This writer meant Horatio Alger, a nineteenth-century author celebrated for his rags-to-riches themes. Alger Hiss was a U.S. State Department official famously accused of being a communist in 1948.
A CNN reporter paired a negative modifier with a positive adjective when she said that Americans were "notoriously" generous.
When actor Jerry Orbach died, an entertainment reporter garbled his message when he said: "His loss is irreplaceable." Another wrote: "We'll miss not seeing him."
After a tornado hit Fort Worth, a local radio reporter announced that twelve square blocks would be "condored" off in the downtown area.
A D-FW television news anchor, describing a tribute to a local luminary, said that the speakers shared "antidotes" during the banquet. Makes you wonder if the food was really that bad.
Sometimes TV sports announcers get so excited they seem not to know what they're saying. A Fox Sports announcer said before a NASCAR Busch series race that the area was "compromised" of three cities, two states, and a whole lot of beauty. An ABC-TV announcer said the quarterback was "telegrafting" where he intended to throw the ball. Another TV announcer screamed during a wrestling match that a wrestler was acting like a man "repossessed."
Good freakies can come from anywhere. ACLU attorney Margaret Winter produced one when she said that a prisoner should not have been put into the general population section of Wichita Falls' James Allred Unit, one of Texas' roughest prisons. In that environment, she said, Johnson was like "catnip to a pack of wolves."
The one-time governor of New Mexico warned that a politically tricky situation would be like "opening a box of Pandoras."
A favorite from the freaky deaky folder came from a member of the Baltimore City Council, who once described an issue as "a little snowball that rolled down the hill, that gathered moss and, when it got to the bottom, became a big mushroom."
Finally, there's the politician who said it didn't matter if the bill was passed after the beginning of the "physical" year; they'd just make it "radioactive."
Paula LaRocque is a former editor and writing coach for the Dallas Morning News and the author of The Book on Writing: The Ultimate Guide to Writing Well.
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